When I was a kid, growing up on a ranch in Southern Alberta, pheasants, geese, ducks and dozens of other wild bird species flew by or around in droves. But there were no wild turkeys.
Perhaps about 15 years ago, I drove into the yard and couldn’t help but notice a wild turkey standing on the roof of the house, cuddled up against the chimney for warmth. Judy, my sister-in-law, said that “Tom” had just strayed from who knows where and decided that Riverbanks Ranch was pretty comfy.
Tom never ventured too far from home and garden. Maggie, the black Lab retriever chased Tom around. Tom chased Maggie back. Tom had personality. He was part of the homestead family for 15 years. I think Judy misses him.
Memories of Tom flashed before my eyes when I look at the photo on the homepage of www.adoptaturkey.com last week. Four turkeys lined up at a table, enjoying a vegetarian feast of pumpkin pie, squash and salad. (Tom didn’t get quite that level of service.)
Such celebrities as Alicia Silverstone, Corey Feldman and Casey Affleck endorse Farm Sanctuary’s Adopt-a-Turkey Project, which has provided safety from the axe for thousands of rescued birds at Watkins Glen, NY and Orland, CA, locations since the program was established in 1986.
Having known Tom, I kinda understand the Farm Sanctuary program. However — and although it’s morally inconsistent — I admit to enjoying gnawing on a fat, juicy drumstick, especially at holiday time. As well, I can’t quite imagine sending a seasonal gift to the Adopt-a-Turkey Project before giving to, say, the Canadian Cancer Society or Amnesty International.
I place the care and feeding of humans above that of animals. Sorry, Tom.
Endangered animals also get a higher ranking on my charity chain and it’s not just because I can donate $40 online at wwf.ca (that’s the World Wildlife Fund, not the former World Wrestling Federation, which is now World Wrestling Entertainment) and receive a $30 tax receipt plus a plush grizzly or snow leopard or cod toy. There are no stuffed turkeys on offer. Sorry again, Tom.
I could give generously to both human and animal, however, by donating a donkey.
For $120, Oxfam Canada’s Give a Leg Up program will buy a donkey for a family in need in the developing world. “Donkeys make kick-ass gifts!” the potential donor is reminded. Chickens ($15) and goats ($58) are the other selections available but I doubt they would be able to live a full life, necessarily, so a donkey is a better choice for the purposes of an equal-opportunity donation.
Okay, Tom, one last apology. I now live about two blocks from an SPCA location in Vancouver. Having seen the collection of cute dogs (yes, one was a black Lab, sorry again), cats and rabbits in cages, I’m inclined to give a little something. My lease stipulates that my apartment remain pet free or I’d be inclined to take a pup away with me on my next visit (not the to-die-for Lab, don’t worry).
And it’s not about “cute,” Tom, you were very handsome.
