Saleh, 33, was dating a Muslim woman whose parents didn't approve of him because of his ethnic background, he says. They broke up, which led to his proclamation of lifelong singleness.
He has started a network called "Happily Single in the Muslim Community!" and hosts online groups on Facebook and Meetup.com.
As an African-American, Saleh also feels a "social responsibility" to parent an African-American boy over the age of four or five, a group that he says are very rarely adopted and often shuffled between foster homes. He realizes that as a single man, such an already challenging adoption will be particularly difficult.
But Saleh is committed above all to his singleness. "I am an extrovert to a friend, but I've kind of learned that balance, where I don't feel like I have to be with someone all the time," he says.
Of course, not all unattached men want to stay that way. The popular online dating site e-harmony says it had trouble attracting men when it first launched in 2000, but has seen a notable increase in interest.
"It seems like there has been a real social shift among men, and that being committed does seem to be cool these days," says J. Galen Buckwalter, vice-president of research and development.
He says there's growing emphasis in our culture on the value of fatherhood and longterm relationships.
Even Scott Baio, star of the VH1 reality show "Scott Baio is 45 ... And Single" is finally settling down for the long haul. And a new reality show on Bravo, "The Millionaire Matchmaker," features dozens of wealthy singles who are looking for everlasting love, even though they could afford to be playing the field for the rest of their lives.
But coupledom isn't for everybody.
Gulvin says he goes out with women, has many friends, a job he enjoys and a loyal cat waiting for him at home at the end of the day. He has no interest in having children and doesn't want to fall in love.
"I don't like the feeling. I find it to be pretty neurotic and dysfunctional," he says. "All you have to do is listen to country-western love songs (if) you want to hear about dysfunctional, co-dependent love relationships."
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On the Net:
Alternatives to Marriage Project: http://www.unmarried.org
Single Edition: http://singleedition.com/

