The ads bug me for two reasons. One, they imply that doing these things together as a couple is really just a way to pass time because you aren't having sex. Okay, so I'm not really into crocheting with my husband, but I certainly do enjoy the intimacy of simple things like a nice walk together on a crisp fall day. And yes, sometimes, we even enjoy shopping together. To imply that the only way to be intimate is to be sexual is insulting and does couples a disservice.
The other thing that bugs me about these ads is that they also imply the only way to enjoy sex is if he can get an erection. Drugs like Viagra may be good at solving a hydraulic problem, but they don't necessarily make you a better lover or address any emotional problems or issues that may be stopping the two of you from enjoying sex.
Do you feel emotionally connected? Appreciated? Loved? Do you know what turns each other on? How to get each other off?
It's a mistake to think that a good sex life is dependent entirely on whether or not he can get it up. A guy can have an erection as strong as an ox and it doesn't guarantee great sex. Unfortunately, men (and women) have been programmed to think that sex=intercourse and intercourse requires an erection. Add to this the fact that an estimated 70% of women don't orgasm through intercourse alone, and heck, maybe she'd still rather go shopping.
Read this couple's story about how they learned to enjoy erection-free sex
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