Having a preschooler who doesn't sleep well takes its toll on mom

Having a child who doesn't sleep can be downright depressing.

As in clinically depressing.

A study conducted by researchers in Australia found that mothers whose children are not sleeping well at age three to four years are more likely to exhibit symptoms of depression than other mothers of young children.

They are also more likely to be experiencing physical health problems that affect their daily functioning and to report that their partner is undermining their ability to deal with their child's behavior.

The study ("Outcomes of Infant Sleep Problems: A Longitudinal Study of Sleep, Behavior, and Maternal Well-Being," Peiyoong Lam, Harriet Hiscock and Melissa Wake, Pediatrics 2003;111;203-207) looked at sleep, behavior, and the well-being of mothers in 114 middle-class families in Melbourne, Australia. All of the families involved in this study had previously participated in an earlier sleep study back while when their children were infants and experiencing significant sleep problems. When they were contacted again by the researchers and invited to participate in the preschooler sleep study, 32 per cent of the families reported that their children were once again experiencing significant sleep problems, with 12 per cent reporting that their child?s sleep problem had been a problem all along and 19 per cent reporting that the sleep problem had been resolved for a time before recurring once again.

The study revealed that the preschoolers who were currently experiencing a sleep problem had some characteristics in common:

• they were waking frequently in the night,
• they needed help from an adult in order to get to sleep, and
• they were exhibiting behavior problems (e.g. aggressive behavior)

Not all parents who were contacted by the researchers considered their child's night-waking behavior to be a problem, even though many of the children involved in the study were waking in the night many times each week. Seventy-eight per cent of mothers reported that their child awoke in the night at least once during the week: 43 per cent (38 of 89) woke four or more nights per week. Mothers typically responded to their child in the night (53 per cent). Allowing the child to cry it out was a strategy used in just 7 per cent of cases.

The researchers found that while sleep problems do resolve themselves in time, one in five sleep problems will recur and families may need to learn new strategies for dealing with sleep problems as their children grow.

The sleep strategies that worked when their children were infants may not necessarily work as their children head into the toddler and preschool years.

However, the basic techniques that worked in helping baby number one to learn to sleep through the night can often be applied to baby number two (if the exhausted and depressed mom can muster up the enthusiasm to plan for baby number two): 75 per cent of the mothers involved in the study who had another child with sleep problems were able to use the sleep strategies they had learned with their first to manage that baby's sleep problems, too.

So what have you learned during your time in the parenting sleep trenches? Any tips to offer other moms and dads?

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