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  • How to approach and talk to this girl in my spanish class?

    Singles & Dating - 5 hours ago

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    She's a freshman, I'm a sophomore. I need advice on this, I'm shy and so is she, she barely talks in class and so do I. She sits across the room, sometimes I notice her staring at me and when I stare back she looks away. And even when I look somewhere near her, I can still see her eyes lookin at me. I'm really shy when it comes to approaching girls, It's been 3 years since I had a girl. Sad, I know. I'm not bad looking at all, but it's my shyness that turns girls off. I need some advice on this. Thanks.
  • Is my girlfriend being rude?

    Singles & Dating - 5 hours ago

    Additional Details

    YESTERDAY, I asked my girlfriend if she had plans for this afternoon. She said "I don't think I do." So I asked her "I was gonna see if you wanted to come over and watch a movie with me." And she replied "I don't know, I'll see." Well...today went by...and she never texted or called me to let me know. WTF? Is she being rude, or should I not think anything about it? She is 18 and I am 22 btw.
  • I want this guy. It is not a question. :/..?

    Singles & Dating - 5 hours ago

  • How do I choose between a job and relationship?

    Singles & Dating - 6 hours ago

    Additional Details

    Here's the skinny: I have lived my whole life in one place, and then moved somewhere for grad school. My fiance and I have had a long-distance relationship for 5 years (8 hours apart, weekend visits about once a month). She has lived all over growing up and now has a stable job near her family. She has absolutely refused to move away from her family when it comes time for me to find a job. I'm about to get a PhD and want to make sure I take advantage of it. There are job opportunities around the country, but I have not really pursued them so that I can find something near home (we both are from the same area), even though it would be almost a step down from the work I have been doing. I recently found out that there is an opening basically with my name on that would greatly increase my skill set for the future, but it's here at my grad school. I am having to decide if it's worth staying here and working for another couple years with the hope I will be more marketable to get better jobs back home, or to move home without a job lined up so we can re-establish our relationship. Personally, I feel like I would benefit from keeping the job here, but my fiance has been with me for 5 years with the hope that I would be home, and I would feel terrible to lose her after all the loyalty she's shown me. I love her very much, but the career/relationship debate has been nagging us for several years now. Any advice? Thanks!
  • What does my ex want?

    Singles & Dating - 6 hours ago

    Additional Details

    Does my ex want me back? We broke up, during a few months before school ended, and it was pretty bad, we ignored each other. Towards the end we were pretty good, but after I asked her to drink with us, and we got into an argument, and argued, and I didn't call her until I sent her a text 3 months later to ask her how everything was. Which she ignored. So we never talked, until she recently got facebook, and she messaged me a few hours right after I added her, and she was trying to keep the conversation going. She was being friendly in the message, asking about me, and when I asked her what's up, she said she just wanted to say hi. And then we talked about stuff, and she brought up stuff from the past, that she remembered I was trying to be the chef, and if my hair was still the same color before. One of my friend who's a friend to her who didn't graduate cause she's 2 years younger, saw her, and they talked. And she said she really missed me, and was sorry about what she said to me, and so she asked my friend for my cell, and if I had text now. What does she really want? It's been a week and a half since I heard the story about her wanting my cell from my friend.
  • I'm anorexic and my ex best friend is super mad at me. what should I do?

    Friends - 6 hours ago

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  • GUYS: What does this mean?

    Friends - 6 hours ago

    Additional Details

    I have this guy I met at a sort of personhood activity(it's all about dealing with people, with the opposite sex, especially).During the activity, I asked for his friend's name, I just wanted to open a small talk that's why I asked. I don't like his friend. So he told me the name. He was my partner for the rest of the activities, and after the day, he asked for my number, so I thought he wanted to have connections, because he wants to be friends. Then for a day, we started texting each other and all. He asked me if he could give my number to his friend (the friend I asked the name), I said yes, I mean, that'd be really rude if I said no. Then he said okay, he'll give the number to the friend. And then he stopped texting me. When he went to our school with all his classmates, he didn't even tell me. I knew they were there because of my friend. So I asked him if they went to our school, he said yes. I just don't know why he didn't tell me. I mean...whatever. So, then just lately, I saw he added up my friends in Facebook, but he didn't add me. I have this thing that maybe he still can't find my profile. I texted him, I asked him if he had an account, but he didn't reply. No reply at all. Did I do something stupid? WHAT?
  • Girls how tall do you want a guy to be?

    Singles & Dating - 7 hours ago

    Additional Details

    We all know girls (at least in america) would almost always rather have a taller guy as a mate, and pretty much require they be at least their height, but my question is, is just around an inch and a half enough of a height difference? I mean for outgoing, hot girls that DO have options. I hate being just shy of 5'10" but always ALWAYS go for chicks that are like 5'8", meaning im an average height guy who likes girls quite a bit taller than average (although not runway model tall)... dunno those legs just kill me :) although 5'7" or 5'6" isnt a killer if it was the right girl, but im not sure girls are as forgiving in a guys height, for chicks in that height range, do you/can you find guys between 5'9" and 5'10" attractive? Would you rather date a guy that is 6 ft? 6'2" ?
  • Family Issues. Help? 10 Points for best answer...Sorry i'm skipping around a lot in my description.?

    Family - 7 hours ago

    Additional Details

    Ok so i am a 16 year old female and in the 11th grade. My parents have been married for 16 years also. So when i was in the sixth grade my dad called my sister and i upstairs. When we got there we saw my mom crying and i dad then told us that he had an affair with another woman about 5 years before an that we had another sister. I did not cry, my sister did. I thought that he was telling me, my mom, and my sister, but he was only telling us. He had told my mom when it happened. I immediately started to resent my mother. I just could and still can't understand how she can stay with him. It seems like since that day me and my mother have never been the same. I pretty my can't stand her. I just feel like she only wanted to stay with him to make us happy but i would much rather have them divorced and happy than together and arguing. My mother and i get in an argument seriously everyday and i has drained me mentally, and emotionally. When my dad hears her and i arguing he comes and starts yelling at me because he feels like i don't respect her. Everytime my dad goes to see my other sister; my mom gets worried and scared that he will have another affair with my sisters mom, and it makes me sick. He is always explaining to my mom that it is not my sisters fault so she has the right to see her father and also he does not have to pay child support. He always say "if i had to pay child support, we would not have this house and we would not be living the life we do because it would make us struggle even more." out of resentment i always take his side. But now i think i hate the man he has become because he is mean, has anger issues, and always thinks he right, and doesn't allow anyone to voice there opinions, but he swears up and down that he doesn't do that.. theres alot more to it but i don't feel like writing it....the only thing i want is for my mom to understand my feeling and for me to be able to talk to her about anything.
  • what do i do!? what do i do!?

    Singles & Dating - 7 hours ago

    Additional Details

    there is this guy i have been best friends with since the seventh grade, cody. we have secretly liked eachother these entire three years and we are now becoming a little flirty. we also have been hanging out at church functions and different things like that together. our friends joke around about how we belong together, and now he is finally asking me to the movies and stuff. everytime he asks im buisy but im thinking of hanging out with him over the thanksgiving break. ANY ADVICE? at all! about future relationship and/or first one on one date with him. anything you desire to type to me. it will help our a bunch. also, do i become completely flirty? will this ruin our friendship if it doesnt work out? AHHHH!
Yahoo! Parenting

Shedding some light on the issue of sleep

Posted Thu, May 10, 2007
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If you're a sleep-deprived parent, you'll be pleased to know that Wendy Hall, an Associate Professor in the School of Nursing at the University of British Columbia, is on the case — the sleep case, that is.

Hall would like the powers that be to start taking the sleep issue seriously: to treat it as a health issue that affects all members of the family, parents and kids alike. As she notes in an article that appeared in the Encyclopedia on Early Childhood Development, "it is difficult to imagine a child whose optimal development would be unaffected by distressed and tired parents."

At the top of Hall's sleep wish list is more dollars for research into the most effective methods of dealing with sleep problems in babies and young children. "Parents have justification for being skeptical about the utility of interventions in the absence of such evidence, particularly when the lay literature provides conflicting views about behavioural sleep problems and optimal solutions," she writes. "More longitudinal research is necessary to support causal relationships between early sleep problems and longer-term social and behavioural difficulties."

The sleep issue could certainly benefit from a bit of a boost — kind of like what happened with the postpartum depression issue. It wasn't that long ago that mothers with postpartum depression suffered in silence. Sure, family and friends knew something was wrong, but the secret was closely guarded, swaddled in a blanket of shame.

Then something shifted. Postpartum depression became a public health priority and mothers started to talk about how hard it was to care for a baby when you could barely take care of yourself.

That's typically what happens with public health concerns. One moment there's low-level awareness of the issue. The next day, the topic is making headline news.

If sleep advocates like Hall have their way, it won't be long before we're having productive conversations about sleep, as opposed to feeling guilty about the sleep choices we did or didn't make or feeling like we have to wear sleep stickers that identify our sleep allegiances to like-minded parents on the playground.

Now, over to you. Post your comments below.

  • Are you losing sleep over sleep?
  • Do you think there should be greater emphasis on sleep research and education?
  • How is sleep (or the lack thereof) affecting your life?
  • What sleep words of wisdom would you like to offer to other parents, based on your own experiences in the sleep deprivation trenches?

 

Not Yet Rated

4 Comments

  • 1. Posted by bdcfdx on Tue, May 29, 2007

    As a Sleep doula I am always shocked that nobody seems to care about all these sleep deprived parents. Most recently the piece from City TV on driving drowsy failed to mention new parents as well. Instead it seems people seem to make parents feel guilty about their survival choices, but don't offer them any resources to make their survival easier. Kudos to Weny Hall (and you too Ann) for her energys to bring this important issue to the issue the spot light. If only people could hear the stories from the sleep trenches would they realize what a important issue this is. Tracey Ruiz aka The Sleep Doula

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  • 2. Posted by anndouglas on Mon, Jun 04, 2007

    Tracey, thanks for swinging by to share your perspective. I remember reading a study in which an alarming percentage of parents reported having momentarily fallen asleep at the wheel during the previous year. It only takes a moment for a car accident to happen, particularly when we're often traveling at high speeds and there's simply no margin for error. The consequences can be devastating.

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  • 3. Posted by anndouglas on Mon, Jun 04, 2007

    Research update: Ontario's Office of the Chief Coroner released a study this afternoon analyzing the leading causes of child deaths. The report highlighted deaths due to unsafe sleeping arrangements as a key area of concern. 12 children died as a result of unsafe sleeping environments in 2005, as compared to 16 in 2004. A CBC news story quoted Ontario's Deputy Chief Coroner Dr. Jim Cairns as saying that babies should only sleep in cribs with properly-fitting mattresses. This is in synch with Health Canada's recommendations. In its 2004 position statement on safe sleeping recommendations for infants and children, the Canadian Paediatric Society noted that bedsharing changes the quality of infant sleep and noted that further research should be done into the ways that proximity to the mother might be protective to a young infant: see http://www.cps.ca/english/statements/CP/cp04-02.htm This is an area of research that James McKenna of the Mother-Baby Behavioral Sleep Laboratory has researched extensively. http://www.nd.edu/~jmckenn1/lab/index.html

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  • 4. Posted by anndouglas on Thu, Jun 21, 2007

    Just thought I'd add a footnote to this post (as I'll continue to do whenever I find anything relevant to earlier discussions). First of all, you might be interested in checking out this interview with Dr. James McKenna @ http://platypusmedia.com/jimmckenna_interview.html. Secondly, there's another discussion thread on sleep here at Yahoo! Parenting: http://ca.lifestyle.yahoo.com/family-relationships/blog/anndouglas/77/baby-sleep-paranoia

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