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Putting parenting under the microscope

Posted Tue, Oct 30, 2007
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At least one or two new parenting studies hit the headlines each and every week, adding more fodder to the debate about what it takes to be a better parent and to raise a healthier, smarter, kinder, more resilient kid. (Did I remember to say smarter?)

Some parenting studies confirm what you've known all along, which can be reassuring if you're thinking everyone else with a screaming baby is living on Bliss Boulevard. ("Fussy babies decrease marital satisfaction among first-time parents.")

Others leave you feeling like the research team recruited their research subjects in Utopia (or wherever it is that all the perfect parents and perfect kids reside).

Some studies make you cringe when you think about how the local busybody is going to apply her newfound scientific knowledge — like when she sees you holding your baby in the wrong position in the local coffee shop.

And then there are those studies that make you stop and take notice because you can immediately see how the findings coming out of these studies could be helpful to someone you know. Maybe even someone in your own family.

  • Doctors in Germany have pioneered a groundbreaking technique for dealing with premature rupture of the membranes (PROM), a condition that occurs in approximately three per cent of pregnancies. The doctors describe the life-saving intervention that they performed during the 20th week of pregnancy-and which allowed the now-healthy baby girl to continue to grow in the mother's uterus until 33 weeks of pregnancy-in the current issue of the medical journal Fetal Diagnosis and Therapy.
  • One in three girls is a mean girl — and the Internet is one of her favourite bullying haunts. A study of Australian girls between the ages of 11 and 19 found that 14 per cent of girls had experienced at least one incident of cyberbullying while 31 per cent had experienced some form of online or offline bullying (or both). The researchers found that the peak age for bullying was 13, with the majority of incidents occurring between the ages of 12 and 15.
  • Video games can rewire people's brains in a positive way. Video game technology can be used to design games that help to boost self-esteem and reduce stress. Researchers at McGill University in Montreal were able to track actual physiological changes (reduced levels of the stress hormone cortisol) in people who played a custom-designed video game designed to reduce their social anxiety.

It's important to know which scientific studies are worth buying into and which ones have all the makings of a b-movie plot or an odd-spot column, but simply don't stand up scientifically. Here's a quick crash course in sorting out scientific studies — a great link to refer back to the next time you come across one of those "why chocolate is better for you than broccoli"-type studies that make their way into the headlines every now and again.

Now over to you. Any of these studies ring true for you? Have you read any studies recently that made you see red? (Sometimes that can happen, too.)

14 Comments

  • 1. Posted by ladeebuginthecountry on Sun, Nov 04, 2007

    If mommy comforts her child when they are upset and builds trust and security, the child will grow up OK. I have been in welfare for 25 years and see firsthand every day how criminals are bred. Indifferent, apathetic females bearing children not because they want children but because they are careless and selfish. It's so sad when their children are in distress and they mother shows no concern.

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  • 2. Posted by les amoureux on Sun, Nov 04, 2007

    It happens all the time, especially on TV commercials, what is never mentioned is sample size, and reliability. Further, scientific research begins with a hypothesis, the way a question (which is based on an assumption or belief of a particular researcher) is posed and tested will inevitably affect the results, thus contradictory results and opposing theories can be explained.. Science is self-correcting, however, as different researchers hold different assumptions about "what is", and eventually false premises can be dis-confirmed.

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  • 3. Posted by les amoureux on Sun, Nov 04, 2007

    A fussy baby, or a troublesome toddler (a child that always wants things his/her way etc.), is precisely what a "normal", healthy child should be like.

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  • 4. Posted by Neo Tarantula on Sun, Nov 04, 2007

    I am so so tired of parenting studies and the resulting helicopter parents who desire to involve (read: INTERFERE) in every single aspect of their kids lives. Guess what folks, here is how I parent my three boys and tehy are healthy, happy and probably won't dread my visits when they are off on their own (because they wont be every week of the year): 1. Be there for them but not hanging over their shoulder 2. Don't sign them up for anything they don't ask to sign up for and don't let them fill in every night of the week with pre-programed activities.. its okay to say "billy, focus on a few things please.." 3. Let them get in trouble at school once in a while without assuming they are being targetted. 4. Did I mention stop hanging over their shoulders? How about, if they play a spot, don't bring the whole family to every game, the kid plays for their own entertainment, not yours. And at the games, shut up and let the coach coach. 5. Stop living your lost youth vicariously through the kids, don't set them up with insane goals in life that are yours, not theirs, and tell them that the important thing in life career wise is to find something they like and can make enough money to live on.. Don't pick a career for them.

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  • 5. Posted by Rioghaina on Sun, Nov 04, 2007

    I SO agree with you, Ladybug. I am by no means the perfect parent. I think to pretend to be so is a lie. Which teaches your children nothing. But what i've seen in my life, and in my work(which is not even related to childcare), breaks my heart. So often I see a child who is just trying to get attention (just by asking...saying 'mom') and the parent completely ignores them. Then they get louder and more insistant. Still nothing. Till they are screaming and throwing tantrums and the people around them are talkimg about what a bad kid she has, when really it was the parent, not the child. How do we expect our kids to grow up feeling respected enough to respect others, when they were not shown any. And believe me i've seen way worse scenerios. Like the couple in the suite below me, who would smoke pot and drink and fight all night and then come up and knock on my door and ask for two pieces of bread for thier six year old. I would invite him in for lunch. Thank God family services finally stepped in. But my point is, that I so agree with you. And really, it is all it takes. Pay attention to your children. Its not 'attention' per se that spoils them. Like some parents seem to fear. My own ex sister in law, refused to pick up her baby to feed him, under the assumption he would 'get use to it' and it would spoil him. Its heartbreaking really, the reality that a lot of these children are coming into.

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  • 6. Posted by nobody_does_better1 on Sun, Nov 04, 2007

    Re: You are your kid's hero: how parents help kids make sense of a confusing and scary world - I'm an educator and have asked my high school students many times who their heroes are. Many reply, "My mother." "My father." Not many refer to Hollywood stars, strangely enough. I've also recommended to Health classes www.sexalityandU.ca (did so just last Friday), the website attached, above, to this very site. Teenagers find it informative and easy to navigate. Far from being a 'lost generation' as often depicted by some media, teens these days are great and never cease to amaze me in their politeness, honesty and willingness to work. Parents must be doing something right.

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  • 7. Posted by SSudsy on Sun, Nov 04, 2007

    While I agree with you, xyz (I see you have some research background), I also think it is the corporations that peddle children's products that distort or overgeneralize the findings. We see this in the Mozart effect - one interesting study, and there is now a whole industry in music for the unborn and Baby Einstein videos (which BTW, serve quite little value) - what happened to just interacting and reading with your child? I have a son that is thriving on that without television and the most in-vogue toys. I enjoy reading about the studies though - and I am glad that I have the choice to look at them critically. You should too.

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  • 8. Posted by britney g on Sun, Nov 04, 2007

    Parenting is one of the hardest job ever, and the fact is that you don't own the children. Our job is the love them and teach with the knowledge that you have, if you feel you lack it get the best resources for you. Not ever thing one read is true. Kids will make thier own choices and parents will have to respect that. Some kids have challeges beyond the norm try to help kids learn how to handle stress and to make wise choices. Ultimately kids need to be taught how to be responsibly for their actions. If one or two of the children made choices that have gotten them in trouble so not blame yourself, forgive your child and help them when they have realize thier mistakes. Parent should not bail a child out of trouble because the parent will be hurting the child in the long run. Spent time hugging and kissing your children, be supportive of thier dreams, not just yours, and spent time listening to them. I keep an extra bed in my room so that my sons can come in during the night to talk, cry or sleep. Once in a while I take them out for lunch during the school week. Remember also that parents are people too, they also get tired, worn and feel like they can not go on. Write a thankful list early in the morning so that parents won't dwell on the negative but more on the positive things about the world and their children. If you are a christian keep your children in prayer and ask for strenght daily. To those parents that are struggling reach out to other parents, you'll be surprise at the many helpful suggestions you can gain. have a blessed day! BG

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  • 9. Posted by wc on Sun, Nov 04, 2007

    My style of parenting, 1st of I don't read any and I mean any parenting studies, 2nd I try to style my parenting style in the exact opposite of my parents and how they rasised me, 3rd I try to avoid parenting the way my illustrious "peers" parent, whenever I think of the young parents today the adults from South Park come to mind, so thats easy. Am I right, I'll tell you in 15-20 years.

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  • 10. Posted by anndouglas on Mon, Nov 05, 2007

    You all make so many interesting/important points. I'm going to respond to them all in one post so look for your name here. Note: Sometimes the formatting wraps everything together, so you may have to look for your name in the comment soup. ======================================= ======================================== Ladybug: I agree that all any human being wants is that human connection -- and that starts right at birth. If the parent isn't responding in that way, something is desperately wrong and that family needs help. ========================================== ========================================== xyz: I agree with both your points. We really have to be scientifically literate and look at the research question. And we have to realize that little kids are doing their jobs by being "needy." They need us. What's wrong with that? ========================================= ========================================= Gorthos: It's all about finding that healthy balance, isn't it? Knowing when to step in and when to back off; and remembering that your child's childhood is his or hers to live, not your second chance to make the hockey team or whatever.... ========================================== ================%

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  • 11. Posted by anndouglas on Mon, Nov 05, 2007

    ======================= PART II of post below..... ======================= SOO: I totally agree with what you said about the marketing of products to parents. And it starts the moment you become pregnant. I recently gave a presentation called "Fear Factor" all about the fear messages that are transmitted to mothers during pregnancy. Your relationship might fall apart! You could get fat! Your friendships might not survive! You might go broke! And so on.... and so on.... ======================================= ======================================= Britney: Your attitude is so wise. We don't own our children. We can simply advise, support, guide, and provide a landing pad (like you do with that extra bed in your room). ======================================= ======================================= Warrencella: It sounds like you've got a really strong sense of what feels right to you. Sometimes a finely tuned parenting radar is the most useful tool of all.

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  • 12. Posted by anndouglas on Mon, Nov 05, 2007

    ============= PART III ============= Some of my comments got chopped off Part I. Here they are again. - Ann ========================================== ========================================== Roighaina: Isn't it amazing how many people still believe that you can spoil a baby by meeting that baby's basic needs? I am on the Advisory Board for Invest in Kids (www.investinkids.ca) -- a really fabulous non-profit parent education association. Their research shows that there is a huge amount of misinformation about parenting (despite the fact that we get bombarded by information every day). Crazy.... ======================================== ======================================== Nobody Does It Better: I love the sexualityandu website. The people behind the website (the SOGC) also have a really fabulous book (Sex Sense) that is really teen friendly. I highly recommend it.

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  • 13. Posted by beyond tommorow on Mon, Mar 02, 2009

    go watch xmen one and two and figure out what it means.

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  • 14. Posted by beyond tommorow on Mon, Mar 02, 2009

    indifferent apathetic societies breed indifferent apathetic parents and so called professionals.

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