Jamie was a happy and open kid who always did well in school. Her dad says: “Jamie used to love using the internet for research but lately I’ve noticed she barely uses the computer at all, and when she does, she quickly closes windows when I enter the room. Suddenly she doesn’t want me to know what she does online or whom she is chatting to. Her marks have dropped in the last semester and she has become withdrawn, even angry. Is this normal teenage behaviour or should I be worried?”
This all sounds like normal teenage behaviour. However, everything you mentioned also sounds like Jamie could be the victim of a cyber-bully. It never hurts to have a talk with your kids about Internet use. You can even download our handy TVOParents.com Printable "Internet-Use Contract" to use at home.
What steps can I take to protect my kids from cyber-bullying?
- Prevention is best, so teach proper netiquette before your kids get online.
- Make sure your kids tell you about something they see or have read online that makes them uncomfortable.
- Ask your Internet provider to restrict specific sites
- Purchase software programs to monitor what kids are doing online, like “Chat Watch”
- Be familiar with the sites that they will be using and bookmark them for easy access
- Keep computers in common areas so you can keep an eye on them
- Be aware of sites your children peruse. Ask questions about what they do online.
- Have your kids sign a "contract" that promotes safe and responsible internet use. We've provided our TVOParents.com Printable "Internet-Use Contract" for you to use.
- Teach your kids never to give out their personal information or passwords/PINs online and never to meet up with an online contact.
- Save and keep copies of any harassing e-mail, web sites, blogs or text messages. (Under the Criminal Code of Canada, it is a crime to communicate repeatedly with someone if your communication causes them to fear for their own safety or the safety of others. It's also a crime to write something that is designed to insult a person or likely to injure a person's reputation by exposing them to hatred, contempt or ridicule.)
- Threatening communication should be reported to your local police and your Internet service provider. (A cyber-bully may also be violating the Canadian Human Rights Act, if he or she spreads hate or discrimination based on race, national or ethnic origin, colour, religion, age, sex, sexual orientation, marital status, family status or disability.)
- If the online bully is a student from school, set up a meeting with the school principal immediately and take copies of the offending items.
- If the bullying is occurring through text messaging, report the problem to your phone provider. They can also provide you with a text history.
- Tell your kids not to re-visit the web site or chat room where they are being harassed until the issue is resolved.
- Be available and approachable so that your children will come to you if they run into trouble online.
To watch the story of David Knight, a student who was mercilessly bullied online, check out the video in the Resources section.
