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  • Can guys explain this to me?

    Singles & Dating - 5 hours ago

    Additional Details

    Why do some guys, not all of course, feel threatened by a girl and see her as competition rather than someone he should care for and respect.Usually they are nice and respectful at first and some guys stay that way but some guys feel they have something to prove and start to play up. I get that girls do this too, but i'm interested in why there are some guys who do this. Is it a power struggle? If its a woman that they feel no control with? she threatens his ego in some way? I get that it depends on the type of women, soe can be loud brash and yell "I'm a strong woman!"- those women are usually weak and also have something to prove. I'm just talking about normal mature level headed girls.
  • What should I do about him?

    Singles & Dating - 6 hours ago

    Additional Details

    I have a friend that i've known for about 9 years. We were quite good friends 9 years ago, but after that we only saw each other occasionally for years. About 6 months ago we got closer again and started seeing each other more regularly. He said to me a few months ago that all those years ago he had a massive crush on me. I was surprised and told him i'd never seen him as anything other than a friend. But I assumed he was over that. It turns out he's not and a friend of his took me to one side the other day and told me that he really, really likes me and since then he's been making it really obvious. Like he made some burritos when i went round to his flat and they were so spicy I could only eat a bit of one and he was visibly upset and kept saying sorry and that he'd f*cked up. I felt really guilty for not being able to eat more. When we chat on MSN or facebook he often implies that he likes me. I've told hm 3 times now that I only see him as a friend and now it's getting to the point that i'm uncomfortable around him. He is a really, really cool guy, I just don't fancy him The thing is, what do I do? I really want to keep this guy as a friend, he's a lot of fun and I like the people i've met through him a lot. I know the best thing is to probably just stop hanging around with him but I don't want to have to do that
  • Should I forgive my best friend?

    Friends - 6 hours ago

    Additional Details

    My best friend of twenty odd years decided to send me a email the other day commenting on my grammar and said that my English was very bad. I had made a comment about a person in a picture and she picked me up on it, saying how, it was only a simple grammar mistake but that I should improve my english. I took this very badly, and probably replied in haste with a few horrible comments, she then said she knew I would act this way, but what I cant understand is, if she knew I would act this way, why would she do or such a thing. She has apologised but when she does it doesn't seem very sincere because she then comes back with, I was doing you a favour by pointing out your english errors, Im sorry you feel this way but......etc etc. I ended up texting her and apologising , saying I probably overreacted but she then left my 16 hours to stew, thinking that it was all my fault...again what friend does this? Im seriously stressed and upset about the whole situation, we have been best friends for years and it came out of nowhere, do you think I should forgive her and move on or would you end the friendship?? I'd really appreciate your advice peeps .
  • Did she break up with me or was it me?

    Singles & Dating - 6 hours ago

    Additional Details

    A few weeks ago she asked whether I was happy with her and if I wanted to continue the realtionship given she felt I still liked my ex. Two weeks later I broke up with her saying that I didnt think there was any future for us. Not because of the ex, but because we were not the right match. She agreed. A few weeks after when I called her she asked that I stop contacting her because she had found the the emails I had sent to my ex during our relationship. I had written how much I loved my ex and thought of her and how little my current gf meant. I was definetly embarrased, but still dont think we belong together. My question really is....was it me or did she break up..or was it mutual?
  • Are there any men left that will buy a woman dinner and not expect anything in return?

    Singles & Dating - 6 hours ago

    Additional Details

    Beastly - been out with 2 muslims and would never do that again. They have less respect for women that other guys.
  • How do I stop being sceptical about guys?

    Singles & Dating - 6 hours ago

    Additional Details

    I dumped my ex for being a sleaze. He was just into sex and was quite disrespectful so I dumped his ass pretty quickly. However there is this new guy who is everything I could want. He is reserved, intellectual, gorgeous well mannered refined and gentlemanly. He seems shy and stares at me a lot, his face lights up when we catch eyes and he holds my gaze and smiles at me. I really want to talk to him but part of me feels angry that he is showing me he thinks i'm attractive. because of my ex i'm wary of being seen as a sex object. I don't advertise myself as one i'm shy, dignified, quiet, bookish and dress modestly. How can I appreciate the fact that a guy actually seems to like me? I can assure you forlorn hope that it was only me who was mature. This guy was the biggest creep you could meet.
  • How Can I Improve My Dating?

    Singles & Dating - 7 hours ago

    Additional Details

    Okay, I've given up on getting a girlfriend the conventional way, I'm in my senior year in college and I've never had a girlfriend, and I haven't met any single women through my friends, in fact all the girls I know are taken. So I started internet dating and I'm still not getting any responses, not even with users that I match over 90% with. So here's my profile at plenty of fish.com view it if you could and tell me what's lacking and why women that I match very well with won't reply to me. I really need the help http://www.plentyoffish.com/member9369742.htm I've run out of users in my tiny central wisconsin area. I'm really running out of options for dates, I don't know what to do anymore. I don't know if I'm just not interesting to women or what. Somebody please help me, it would be greatly appreciated. And no I don't have a single better picture
  • My guy friend wants me to go into a physical relationship with him after I told him I wasn't interested?

    Singles & Dating - 7 hours ago

    Additional Details

    My question is would you consider this person to have problems if he can't take no as an answer the first time? I'm early 20's but he's much older. Adults can behave/act immature at times.
  • Why does physical beauty matter so much? Is that what you think is going to make your relationship last?

    Singles & Dating - 8 hours ago

    Additional Details

    I have never really understood this. It has never mattered to me. So please explain: Why, when it makes no difference to the longevity or quality of your relationship, is physical appearance so important to so many people?
  • for females, is being a single bi sexual................................................?

    Singles & Dating - 8 hours ago

    Additional Details

    is being a bi sexual for a female mostly bcuz shes single and haven't found the right guy? bcuz there are lots of single gals out there vs single guys. before if a female like another female she was a lez but now it seems not that way. and it seems the other girl is not happy for the bi girl to be with guys. what is your take on this? i'm a straight guy and seen girls that are bi but it seems to be a convenience thing for them, if she really liked girls she should be a lesbian right? this relates to single females hellolex, u do understand my question

Find the Money

How to come up with the cash you need when life hands you an expensive — yet welcome — surprise

By Sandra E. Martin
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Your third baby. An invitation for your son to play rep hockey next season. Your daughter’s acceptance letter to a premier ballet school. Some of the most important news headlines of your family’s life come with a sobering chaser: Will we be able to afford this? The averagefamily’s budgetis tight, with little room for those surprise extras. But here’s good news: There are ways to find the money you need, without racking up a crippling balance on your credit cards — and without having to make any permanent lifestyle changes. Here are five of the best.

Put your home to work for you

Chances are your mortgage is the family’s largest expense. While we can’t recommend a technique for making it disappear (aside from maybe winning the lottery), there are ways of using a home loan to your family’s financial benefit.

Borrow from the house
When you need more than a few thousand dollars for an expense that will add value to your family life, adding to yourmortgage principalor taking out a home equity loan or line of credit is a smart move, says Patricia Lovett-Reid, senior vice-president with TD Waterhouse Canada and host of the personal finance television showMoneyTalk. A perfect example: constructing a third bedroom to the “starter home” that’s too small to accommodate the children you already have, let alone the baby you’re expecting next spring. Post-reno, you’ll be much more comfortable, plus your property’s resale value will have skyrocketed.

Borrowed money that’s secured by the value in your home is the cheapest you can get because lenders know that if you ever default, they can collect through the sale of your home. (Serious stuff — so use only as much borrowed money as you need, which will help ensure you can always make your payments on time.)

Should you bump up your mortgage amount or ask for a home equity loan? That is a personal decision that depends on a number of factors, including how much you still owe on your home, how disciplined you are with spending and what you need the money for. But a sit-down meeting with your lender can help you make the right decision, says Rick Jaques, a BMO Bank of Montreal district vice-president in Windsor, Ont.

Stretch out your payments
Need smaller amounts of money over a long period — for example, to squeeze in the cost of a second weekly ballet class for your budding Baryshnikov? Boost your cash flow by reducing your monthly mortgage payment. Ask to increase your amortization — that’s the number of years your total loan is spread out across. The longer you take to pay, the less you will have to shell out each month. Let’s say that you currently owe $200,000 on your home, with payments of $1,786.50 per month over the next 15 years. If everything else stays the same, including your seven percent interest rate, simply changing your amortization to 20 years will reduce your payments by nearly $250 a month. Change it to 25 years, and your payments drop by nearly $400 a month.

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